Monday, September 30, 2013

HAS ANYONE SEEN MY TESTICLE.?


Here's a "before" and "after" shot of the latest piece.
 If there is one thing about me, it's this...I RARELY ask for help.
It's not a "I'm so independent" thing, it's more of a "I'm as stupid as I am stubborn" thing.
 In order to take this not so stunning photo, I had to carry this table up a couple of steps, and into the sun light. Somewhere between where the table was and where it is...lies one of my testicles.
 The silver lining to that dark cloud is that I can now belt out Michael Jackson's "I want you back" like nobody's business.
 Enough about my balls.
This was another table from the KLEIN tool factory.
 These are not from a manufacturer. While working on them I make up stories about them in my head
I imagine some guy, working the midnight shift at KLEIN, back in the early 60's, bored out of his mind because he's already read the same newspaper cover to cover 3 times and still has 6 hours left on his shift. and decides to weld up a project table, not for it's function and more for passing time.
 Little does this man know, that some 50 plus years later, some asshole has chopped it up and has written a story on the interweb about it.
 I tip my coffee cup to you, "Mr. Midnight shift Klein tool factory worker". Although you most likely are dead and gone....your project table lives on.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

GRINDING

I feel as if the grinder has become a permanent extension of my hand.
 Grinding this new table down has been excruciating. Just when I think I'm done, I discover a new section that I missed.
 I should be referred to as "THE MAN OF STEEL" not because of my superior strength and stunning good looks, but because I've blasted so much fucking steel and paint up my nose this past week, that I believe it has fused with my DNA.
 Today I will finish the wood top and bottom shelf. I'm in a race to the finish line so that my boy can hopefully sell it at the last outdoor Randolph Market.
 This photo has nothing to do with furniture, but we were lucky enough to have family portraits done by Martin Sorrondeguy (check out his latest photo book "GET SHOT") this past weekend.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

GETTING THE VAGINA OFF MY MIND

This piece was done entirely at Salvage One's shop.
 I was able to work on it whenever I had free time and everyone there was super nice, but not having it outside my kitchen window was driving me a little nutty.
 I obsess about...everything.
If I have a bill due, I can't sleep until it's paid, if I have to go to the post office, it will haunt me until I go.
 Once I started this piece, I walked into a whole new brand of crazy.
Luckily, it's pretty much done.
 The first finish coat has been applied, and Collin is going to add the next two coats with some buffing in between to give it that hand rubbed appeal.
 I spent the last half hour at the shop just staring at it. There's a lot to look at.
The term "Functional Art" is used best to describe this piece as opposed to "Table"
 I'm glad and the world should be glad I'm not a salesman. If I worked there, and someone said "excuse me sir, how much is that TABLE?", I most likely would go into a tirade along the lines of..."TABLE? That's not a fucking TABLE. A table is something your kids spill Cheerios all over, or you toss your mail on! This is something you look at, you discuss it. This is a piece that will OWN a room, it COMMANDS attention. Table...get the fuck outta here."
 Yeah, that probably wouldn't work out so well.

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

STORM CHASING

My guy dropped off another table.
 This one is going to be more of a challenge because it's pretty...whatever.
Don't get me wrong, it's cool, and super heavy, but there's no "WOW" factor, so I have to create it.
 There was a steel top on it that I already cut off. I really wanted to get the paint stripped off before the rain, so I could let it rust outside, but I think I'm going to have to do the old Muriatic acid trick.
 I have a lot of ideas to make this more appealing as well as useful, the problem is that I really hate buying materials for pieces like this. I'd much rather just come across something that works for it.
 It's funny how the universe works, because more often then not, something will fall into my lap.
I've never had so many projects going on at the same time, and I'm not sure if that works to my advantage . If anything, it's a exercise in patience.
 I would love for the day when I can dedicate all my work time to these pieces. At this point, I pick away here and there until I get to the home stretch, then I go full retard to get it done. It's a sucky formula, but it's the only one that I have to work with.
 There's a couple of things on the horizon that I'm excited about.
Phil Cisco from Maximum Tattoo is doing a logo for me. Once that is done, I'm having this guy Santiago from Brooklyn screen printing me cloth furniture tags as well as some t shirts.
 I've had a couple other people working on logos, but I'm not the guy that is gonna pester someone to do something for me. I check in on progress a couple of times, and if nothing happens...I leave it alone. These are friends who were doing stuff that never came to be, and it's not worth it to get worked up over it. People have lives, and shit going on...I get it. If I hired some hot shit designer to do something, and had to wait months, I could promise you that there would be a "hot shit designer" in an emergency room somewhere, having a computer removed from his rectum.
 You get what you pay for, and if you paid nothing, you should expect nothing.

Friday, September 13, 2013

EXERCISE IN BEING FOCUSED

2 things happen when your focused.

1. You work fast and efficiently
2. The end result is beautiful.

This one is done and done.
 I'd love to get all wordy about it, but it's Friday and you all have better shit to do.
Have a good weekend.
 Me and Max will be at the Screeching Weasel stage tonight and the Los Crudos shows on Saturday.
It's a puck rock weekend, and I vow not to touch a tool...at least until Sunday.

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

AMERICAN HISTORY

I've been picking away at the factory cart.
 This has been one of the more difficult projects because it was already cool when it was brought to me. It's almost easier when you get your hands on a real turd, because then, the possibilities are endless.
 I understand the average buyer, and most of them can't see things for what they are.
This is more then a factory cart. It's a piece of American history. It's from a time when people went to work clean, and came home dirty. A time when you went to work and made more then a wage, you actually made something tangible.
 What I made was some really cool shelf brackets out of 3/16" steel.
I'm a humble guy, but I do want to pat myself on the back for these, for a couple of reasons.
 The first reason is that I haven't had to touch that Chinese bender in a while, and while making these, something just clicked, and I feel like I fully understand this tool now.
 The second reason is...I really wanted to add a bottom shelf. I had to figure out a way to mount the shelf in a manner that made it appear to have always been there. Ideas are great, but facilitating them is a whole new ball game, so when you have a idea and are able to make it happen, well...it just feels good.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

ON THIS EPISODE OF..."PIMP MY FACTORY CART"

I have no intention of putting "spinners" and crazy hydraulics on this cart, but what I can tell you is that it will be something extraordinary...I think.
 Being in bands, being an artist, and doing what I'm doing now has put a lot of good people in my life. In this new venture I was contacted by a guy I went to elementary school with.
 His name is James Bigwood, and I haven't seen him since 8th grade.
Thanks to this blog and social media, he contacted me to let me know of some vintage factory carts he acquired.
 Now, he very well could've flipped these "AS IS", got a pocket full of dough and moved on, but he saw something more in them, and chose me to re-birth them.
 That being said, these carts will get the respect and innovation that they are deserving of.
There are 17 carts of all different shapes and sizes. He dropped this one off yesterday, and we made a feeble attempt at catching up on 27 years that have come and gone.
 Not only am I stoked about these pieces, but I do look forward to being involved with someone from my childhood.
 It's times like these that I wish I had a cool warehouse loft home like that Janet Jackson video from the 80's, because I would keep every single one of these carts. But I don't. So our goal with these is to make something very home owner friendly without the asshole price tag that most people that sell these put on them.
 After looking at Etsy and Ebay, I see what most people are trying to rape buyers for, and I think it's kind of a dick head move.
 It's my opinion that most people who buy this sort of stuff deserve a quality piece at a fair price.
I'd like people to walk away feeling good, instead of feeling like they just got hustled.
 Karma has no interest in money.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

LABOR DAYS

I thought that the point of "LABOR DAY" was for those who bust their ass day in and day out, to take a break?
 Not so for this Laborer.
I have to seize the moment when I can, so on Sunday I went and put in more work on this piece.
 I put the final sand on, grinded down the 3rd base, and while rummaging through Salvage One's finish room, I came across some black metal flake paint and proceeded to paint the bases.
 All that is left is putting a finish on the top, make a stretcher for the legs, mount the top, and then you will all be spared from having to see anymore photos at bad angles of this table.
 While working on this piece, I have spent a lot of time thinking about what it's like to own a hand made piece.
 It's hard for me to put it in  perspective because I made almost everything in our house, but there is a small painting that was given to me by Anthony Lewellen. It hangs in our bedroom and it really holds a special...something.
 I guess that's why people collect Art. There's a personality behind it, a soul, a reason, a hand.
If you really think about our lives, most things we own are processed, mass produced, and cold.
whereas when you have a piece from an artists hands, it brings a warmth and a soul to your environment.
 I don't know. That's just the wacky shit that runs through my head when I'm working.