Monday, February 23, 2015

ME? SHUT MY MOUTH? HAH!


It's not that my closet is too small, the fact of the matter is that I have too much shit.
 Some people collect stamps, some collect records. I collect clothing.
I collect work wear type clothing otherwise known as Heritage clothing.
 It's really a subculture like punk rock was a subculture, the difference is, instead of making music, they make clothing.
 It's strange, right? I could go into a deep explanation of this subculture but this isn't really about what I do in my spare time. In all honesty, I've been trying to explain it to my girl for the last 2 years, so I highly doubt I would be able to paint a picture for you all in a few paragraphs.
 What it does come down to is...I made a new type of hanger.
Whoop-de-fuckin'-doo you say, and I can fully embrace your reaction, but in my defense, this little chunk of metal gave me 50% more closet space.
 There's a man who I've been doing a lot of work for lately. His name is Otis Gibson and he owns a advertising agency called GERTRUDE.
 Otis isn't just a client. Otis is a friend.
Otis is the type of man who sits at boardroom tables with executives who write checks ending in more zeros then you or I will ever be depositing in our ATM, so when I showed him this little gem, Otis said "Brian, can I give you some free advice?" and he put his fore finger to his lips and said "SHHHHHHHHHHH".
What he meant was that I was on to something and I should shut the fuck up until I could get a patent and attorneys and a 3rd party manufacturer.
 I thought about it...every minute of every day since that conversation happened.
I did the math.
 After working all the numbers and dissecting the equation, the final answer I came up with was...fuck that.
 If Otis had hair he would be pulling it out right now. One of his favorite things to say to me is "what's wrong with you, don't you like MONEY?"
The truth of the matter is, by time I paid for technical drawings, a patent attorney, patent fees, a licensing attorney, a 3rd party manufacturer, marketing, graphic and packaging design  and god knows what else...I'd only be a couple hundred grand in the hole.
 I decided to take the dirt road as opposed to the nice paved tollway.
I'm gonna make them myself. Retailers or individuals can buy them from me and know that it came from my hand, one at a time.
 Someone will eventually knock them off, have them made from plastic in China, make a zillion dollars, and the reality of our world is...that's just the way the fuckin' cookie crumbles.
 I'd be delusional to think that my cookie would stay intact.
Bottom line is...I make shit by hand...one at a time...you either want that or you don't.
 Here's my selling point though, for a retailer...If you're selling denim in the 2 to $400 range, why would you display them on a piece of shit hanger? I know the retailers margin, and lets just say that there is some room to jazz things up a little.
 For the individual...you work hard, you spend good money on your clothing, why not gain some closet space and have something that compliments your investment in your clothing?
 The final selling point is...they just look cool.
You wouldn't put regular gas in a Bugatti, or fill a million dollar home with IKEA furniture, right?
 I've said it before and I'll say it again...I NEVER lose.
Even if I don't sell one, not one single one....I still have more room in my closet, and a jump on next Christmas's gift giving.

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